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Somatic Awareness
Understanding your nervous system in counselling stress, anxiety, depression and trauma.
My practice is a trauma-informed talking therapy to help you understand your nervous system and feel safer and more regulated.
In counselling, this is about helping your system feel safer and more regulated over time. Pensieve is a talking therapy that explores the interaction between mind and body when emotional challenges leave them feeling at odds or disconnected.
The physical force of our nervous system reactions, whether you are experiencing depression, grief, trauma, stress, or anxiety, is often underestimated and misunderstood. Our nervous systems are fundamentally wired to keep us safe (absence of threat and presence of connection), but difficult life experiences, relationship dynamics, and daily pressures can shape what we come to expect from the world.
Over time, these experiences form relational patterns that live in both the mind and the body, heavily influencing how we manage stress and experience ourselves in everyday life.
- People-pleasing: Putting others’ needs first above your own
- Self-criticism: An inner critic that judges your actions
- Anxiety: Feeling anxious about emotional closeness, and/or distance, and changes in relationships.
- Ruminating: Rehashing old conversations or script-writing future ones.
- Keeping the peace: Constantly managing situations to avoid friction, protect others’ emotions, or shield them from discomfort.
- Carrying others’ feelings: Feeling responsible for the emotional states, moods, and happiness of the people around you.
- Feeling stuck or frozen: Low-energy, shut down.
- Breathing changes: Holding your breath or shallow breathing.
- Physical restlessness: Inability to sit still or a feeling that you must stay busy.
- Hyper-organised: Over-planning/organising every detail
- Hyper-independence: Asking for help feels unsafe or like a burden.
Tuning into Your Nervous System
Working with your nervous system involves tuning in to what is happening in your body and mind in the present moment and gently helping it settle. This includes noticing the body’s signals such as physical tension, a racing heart, or a sudden sense of shutdown and learning to respond in ways that help you feel more grounded.
I may use grounding or distraction techniques or anchors if you experience intense emotions (we can discuss what works for you when we meet). This is not to avoid or suppress your emotions, but to help calm your nervous system so they feel more manageable, a bit like using the brakes going downhill, so you don’t lose control. By introducing this brake to your nervous system, it begins to be able to pause and reflect before deciding the best way forward.
This process can be supported through conversation, reflection, and, where helpful, creative or imagery-based approaches, always at a pace that feels right for you. By staying within what your nervous system can tolerate, we can begin to understand its edges and limits from a place of emotional safety, naturally expanding your comfort zone as you are able to tune in to your inner world safely and understand yourself better.
If you would like to chat about how my counselling and coaching services in Dorset can support your unique path, please get in touch to arrange a warm, informal conversation.
Ready to have a chat?
Nicky x
Anxiety Approved Therapist
Approved Vitality Health Insurance Provider